When Good Enough Is Good Enough: The Perfectionist's Paradox When I was single, life was simple. I worked and worked out— going to the job site every morning, plying my skill as an electrician and working toward being a skilled craftsman (not just a journeyman). Then after work, after a quick shit, shower and shave, and a quick bite, I'd head to the dojang to get there around 3pm and have the place to myself to work on strikes (against the heavy bag and makiwara), techniques and breakfalls....
1 day ago • 14 min read
Stop Saying "Sorry": Why Apologies Without Action Are BS I learned this the hard way on the construction site and on the mat and I'm hoping by sharing this, you will avoid the pain I went through. People use the word "sorry" as a way to absolve themselves of responsibility. Sorry doesn't mean anything unless it creates a new set of behaviors and eliminates the need to apologize for the same error again. Do you know people who keep saying sorry for the same stuff? It's because you've given...
2 days ago • 13 min read
Choosing the Right Game: Why Finite Thinking Destroys Infinite Relationships Not too long ago, I wrote about the differences between jutsu, sport, and do martial arts schools and how you need to find the right school for your needs and goals at your stage of life—athlete, warrior, leader, sage. Here's the framework: Jutsu schools focus on combat effectiveness—techniques designed to incapacitate or kill. The goal is survival. The mindset is life or death. Win or die. Sport schools focus on...
3 days ago • 13 min read
Surround Yourself With Success: The Marcus Aurelius Lesson I Missed for Years Meditations by Marcus Aurelius As is my habit, I start the New Year with my annual re-exploration of Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. The great thing about revisiting great books regularly and learning new things from them is not that the book has changed and somehow shown you something new—it's that you've changed and can now take in something that was there the whole time, but you have evolved and can "see" it now....
4 days ago • 13 min read
The One Skill That Makes Everything Easier: Why Everyone Needs to Learn Marketing I have to be honest—I really don't know how I got and "kept" my wife Amy 25 years ago. I was so emotionally-retarded (and yes, I know that's not PC, but I'm still blue-collar at heart, LOL) and had poor communication and connection skills. I'm better now, but still have so much to learn. One thing that has helped me more than I could have ever imagined was when I started taking classes and reading books to help...
5 days ago • 14 min read
The Yin Before the Yang: Why Being Busy Keeps You Broke, Exhausted, and Behind I remember years ago reading a quote that changed how I approach everything: "If you have only 8 hours to cut a cord of wood, spend the first 7 sharpening the saw." A cord of wood That's where most people fuck up. They're so filled with excitement, enthusiasm, and energy to get shit done that they jump into it with both feet, going 100mph fast and getting nowhere. They confuse activity with progress. They mistake...
6 days ago • 13 min read
Discover Your Genius: What's Keeping You Unhappy, Unsuccessful, and Disillusioned Nosce Te Ipsum at the Temple of Apollo Like everyone, growing up, I didn't know myself. The Greek wisdom inscribed on the Temple of Apollo at Delphi—"Know Thyself"—completely escaped me. I moved through life unaware of my unique gifts, trying to become good at what others valued rather than discovering what came naturally to me. Discover Your Genius by Michael J. Gelb That changed when I discovered Michael J....
7 days ago • 12 min read
Try Softer: Why Trying Harder Is Sometimes a Recipe for Failure For almost twenty years, I was blessed to train under Grandmaster Bong Soo Han, a hapkido martial artist whose prowess was immortalized in the film Billy Jack. That movie featured what was, at the time, one of the most "realistic" fight scenes ever filmed—the protagonist taking on multiple assailants in a city park. The scene included GM Han's famous demonstration: "I'm going to take this right foot and wallop you on that side of...
8 days ago • 11 min read
The Single Difference Between a Badass and a Bully: Four Words That Change Everything It's that time of year again—when we make resolutions, promises, and plans to live a better life. And that's genuinely a good thing. Filling your life with hope and aspirations is essential for growth and fulfillment. But as so often happens, after a few days, weeks, or months, so many of us get derailed from those hopes and dreams. And like countless people I've heard from over the years, they'll have...
9 days ago • 12 min read