Why You’re Stuck: The Simple Practice That Separates People Who Improve From People Who Just Try

It’s not insanity to try the same thing twice. It’s insanity to try it without knowing why it worked or didn’t.

You’ve heard the quote.

It gets thrown around constantly. In business. In self-help. In coaching.

And while there’s truth in it, most people get it wrong.

The problem isn’t that people are doing the same thing over and over.

The problem is that they’re doing different things over and over—without any methodology for understanding what’s working and what isn’t.

They’re not repeating the same action. They’re throwing spaghetti at the wall.​

Different spaghetti. Different walls. Different days.

But no system for knowing whether it stuck. Or why. Or whether it’ll stick again.

And that’s the real insanity.

The Spaghetti Problem

Here’s what most people’s approach to improvement actually looks like:

1. They try something.
2. It doesn’t work.
3. They try something else.
4. That doesn’t work either.
5. They try a third thing.
6. Maybe that works a little.
7. They’re not sure why.
8. They try a fourth thing.
9. Back to not working.
10. ​Ad nauseum.​

And they call this “trying different things.”

But it’s not a methodology.

It’s chaos with good intentions.

Because without tracking, without measuring, without reflecting—you have no way of knowing:

• What actually worked
• What didn’t work and why
• What the conditions were when something succeeded
• What variables changed when something failed
• What patterns are emerging across multiple attempts

You’re just throwing spaghetti. And hoping.

The Scientific Method Isn’t Just for Scientists

Before I go too far into the weeds, I want to acknowledge something:

There are two fundamentally different approaches to improvement.

The Western, atomistic, scientific-method approach:

1. Break things down.
2. Isolate variables.
3. Test one thing at a time.
4. Measure precisely.
5. Draw conclusions from data.

The Eastern, holistic, Taoist approach:

1. Don’t stop the river to measure it.
2. Observe the whole system.
3. Trust the flow.
4. Notice patterns without forcing them.

Both have strengths. Both have limitations.

For the purposes of this conversation, we’re going to focus on the Western approach.

Not because it’s better. But because it’s the one that is easier to implement in the beginning.

Because most people who are struggling aren’t struggling because they’re too analytical. They’re struggling because they’re not analytical enough.

They’re not tracking. They’re not measuring. They’re not reflecting.

And without those things, you can’t improve systematically. You can only improve accidentally.

The Simple Truth About Measurement

Here’s the principle that changed everything for me:

If you’re not measuring it, you’re not managing it.

And the corollary:

If you’re not tracking it, it’s not a big enough priority in your life.

That’s it. That simple.

If your health is a priority, you’re tracking what you eat, how you sleep, how you move.

If your business is a priority, you’re tracking your leads, your conversions, your revenue.

If your relationships are a priority, you’re tracking how much quality time you’re spending with the people who matter.

If you’re not tracking it, you’re not prioritizing it.

You’re just saying you are.

And there’s a massive difference between saying something is a priority and actually treating it like one.

Chuck’s Time: The Practice That Changed Everything

For decades, I’ve had a Sunday morning ritual.

I call it “Chuck’s Time.”

Just me and a notebook. Well, now it’s my reMarkable tablet. But the practice is the same.

I sit down every Sunday morning and answer three questions:

1. Where am I?

Not where I want to be. Not where I was. Where am I right now?

What’s the current state of my health, my business, my relationships, my finances, my training?

Honest assessment. No spin. No wishful thinking.

2. How did I get here?

What did I do this week—or this month, or this quarter—that moved me toward or away from where I want to be?

What were the inputs? What were the decisions? What were the habits?

What’s the story of how I arrived at this current state?

3. Where am I going?

Given where I am and how I got here, what’s the next step?

What do I need to adjust? What do I need to adopt? What do I need to abandon?

What’s the plan for the next week, month, quarter?

Then I look at all of the inputs I set out and see what outputs came out the other end.

And from there, I decide what to adjust, adapt, adopt, and abandon.

Why Writing It Down Matters

Here’s what most people miss:

It’s not enough to think about these questions. You have to write down the answers.

Not because writing is magical. But because writing does three things that thinking alone can’t:

1. It creates a record.

When you write things down, you have something to look back on. You can see patterns over time. You can remember what you’ve forgotten. You can track your progress across weeks, months, years.

When a friend suggested I read, Stumbling on Happiness, I was shocked to find out that I couldn't trust what I saw, felt and remembered.

I joked with him that I hated him for recommending the book because what else did I have besides what I see, feel and think...

Without a record, you’re relying on memory. And memory is unreliable.

You’ll remember the wins and forget the losses. Or remember the losses and forget the wins. You’ll misremember the timeline. You’ll confuse cause and effect.

A written record doesn’t lie.

2. It frees up mental bandwidth.

When you’re trying to hold everything in your head—all your goals, all your progress, all your concerns, all your plans—you’re using cognitive resources that could be used for actual thinking.

Writing things down offloads that cognitive burden.

It frees up your mental bandwidth for executive functioning. For strategic thinking. For creative problem-solving.

You can’t think clearly when your brain is full of things you’re trying not to forget.

3. It forces clarity.

You can have a vague sense of something in your head. A fuzzy feeling that things are going well or not well. A general impression of progress or stagnation.

But when you try to write it down, the vagueness has to become specific.

“Things are going okay” has to become “Revenue is up 15% but client retention is down 20%.”

“I’ve been training pretty consistently” has to become “I made it to the mat four times this week but missed my solo drilling sessions.”

Specificity is where improvement lives. And writing forces specificity.

How to Apply the Scientific Method to Your Life

Here’s how you do it:

Step 1: Define what you’re trying to improve.

Not everything at once. One thing.

What’s the one area of your life where you most want to see improvement?

Your health? Your business? Your relationships? Your training? Your finances?

Pick one. Be specific.

Step 2: Establish your baseline.

Before you can measure improvement, you need to know where you’re starting.

What’s the current state of this area?

Not where you want it to be. Where it actually is.

Write it down. Be honest. Be specific.

Step 3: Form a hypothesis.

This is the step most people skip. And it’s the most important one.

Before you try something, predict what you think will happen.

“If I do X, I expect Y to happen because Z.”

“If I add a morning training session, I expect my energy levels to improve because I’ll be starting the day with movement.”

“If I follow up with leads within 24 hours, I expect my conversion rate to improve because responsiveness builds trust.”

A hypothesis forces you to think before you act. To understand the reasoning behind your approach.

And when you have a hypothesis, you can actually learn from the results—whether they confirm or contradict your prediction.

Step 4: Test it. Track it.

Now implement the change. And track what happens.

Not in your head. On paper. Or on your tablet. Or in a spreadsheet.

Track the inputs: What did you actually do?

Track the outputs: What actually happened?

Track the conditions: What else was going on that might have influenced the results?

The more specific your tracking, the more useful your data.

Step 5: Reflect on the results.

At the end of the week—or the month, or the quarter—sit down with your data.

What worked? What didn’t? What surprised you?

Did the results confirm your hypothesis? Or contradict it?

If they confirmed it: Great. What can you do to amplify this?

If they contradicted it: Interesting. Why? What did you miss? What did you learn?

Step 6: Adjust, adapt, adopt, or abandon.

Based on your reflection, decide what to do next.

• Adjust: Keep the approach but modify it based on what you learned.
• Adapt: Apply the principle to a different area or context.
• Adopt: This is working. Make it a permanent part of your system.
• Abandon: This isn’t working and the data shows it. Let it go.

Then form a new hypothesis. And start the cycle again.

What This Looks Like in Practice

Here’s a real example from my BJJ training:

I noticed I was getting passed on my left side more than my right. That was the observation.

• My hypothesis: My left hip mobility is limiting my guard retention on that side.
• The test: I added specific left hip mobility work to my solo drilling sessions for four weeks.
• The tracking: I kept notes after each roll on how many times I got passed on each side.
• The reflection: After four weeks, left-side passes were down. But I also noticed I was getting caught in a specific submission more often—which suggested a different gap in my game.
• The adjustment: Continue the hip mobility work. Add specific defense for that submission.

That’s the scientific method applied to BJJ.

Not throwing spaghetti. Not just “training harder.” A systematic approach to identifying problems, testing solutions, and learning from results.

And the same approach works for business, relationships, health, finances—anything you want to improve.

Why Most People Don’t Do This

Here’s the honest truth about why most people don’t track, reflect, and adjust:

It requires sitting with reality.

And reality is often uncomfortable.

When you track your actual results—not your hoped-for results, not your remembered results, but your actual results—you have to face the truth.

The truth that you’re not as consistent as you thought. That the approach you’ve been defending isn’t working. That the progress you thought you were making isn’t showing up in the data.

That’s uncomfortable. So most people avoid it.

They prefer the comfortable vagueness of “I think things are going pretty well” to the uncomfortable specificity of “Here’s exactly what’s working and what isn’t.”

But comfortable vagueness doesn’t produce improvement. Uncomfortable specificity does.

The Sunday Morning Practice

Here’s my invitation to you:

Start your own version of Chuck’s Time.

Pick a time. Once a week. Non-negotiable.

Sit down with a notebook—or a tablet, or a journal, or whatever works for you—and answer the three questions:

• Where am I?
• How did I get here?
• Where am I going?

Then look at your inputs and outputs. Decide what to adjust, adapt, adopt, or abandon.

Do this every week for a month. Then look back at your four weeks of notes.

You’ll see patterns you couldn’t see before. You’ll remember things you’d forgotten. You’ll have data to make better decisions.

And you’ll have freed up the mental bandwidth that was being used to hold all of this in your head.

That bandwidth? You can use it for actual thinking. For strategy. For creativity. For leadership.

My Challenge for You

Here’s what I want you to do this week:

Start tracking one thing.

Just one. The area of your life where you most want to improve.

Define your baseline. Form a hypothesis. Track your inputs and outputs.

Then at the end of the week, sit down and reflect.

What worked? What didn’t? What will you do differently next week?

Write it down. Keep the record.

And do it again next week. And the week after that.

Because improvement isn’t about trying harder. It’s about trying smarter.

And trying smarter requires knowing what you’ve tried, what happened, and why.

The Final Word

The real insanity isn’t doing the same thing over and over.

It’s doing different things over and over without any system for knowing what’s working.

It’s throwing spaghetti at the wall without tracking which pieces stuck, which fell, and why.

The fix is simple. Not easy. But simple.

Track it. Measure it. Reflect on it. Adjust.

If you’re not measuring it, you’re not managing it.

If you’re not tracking it, it’s not actually a priority.

And if you want to get better—in life, in business, on the mat, in your relationships—you have to start treating your improvement like the priority you say it is.

Not with an angry Italian chef throwing his work at the wall.

With a scientist. A hypothesis. A record. And a willingness to learn from the results.

What are you going to start tracking this week?

⚔ The Dojo Drill

Today’s training:

Ask yourself three questions.

1. Where am I?
2. How did I get here?
3. Where do I want to go?

Write your answers down.

Clarity begins with honesty.

📚 Leader’s Library

Book I recommend this week:

​The War of Art – Steven Pressfield​

Why?

Because resistance is the invisible enemy.

🧠 Warrior Question

What’s one habit you know you should fix…

…but keep avoiding?

Hit reply and tell me.

I read every response.

🔥 Take the Warrior Self-Assessment Quiz

Want to know where you stand?

Take this week's 2-minute leadership assessment.

It will tell you your current belt level.

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🏯 Work With Me

If you want help building real discipline, direction, and leadership:

I offer:

• 1:1 coaching
• leadership systems
• warrior mindset training

Hit Reply and tell me what you need help with.

I read and respond to every inquiry.

Chuck